Have you ever been to a yoga class? What do we call that posture? It is your stance. What about when we advance a case for our client say if you are an advocate? That’s the stance. We have a stance that forms the gamut of our entire belief system and therefore how our life shapes itself, and then we have the micro stance we take stemming from that paradigm. Now, what will the advocate do when the other side, meaning who we are up against, threatens the very stance we take? That is not the same as threatening the merits of the case, but rather the merits of what the case is built on. Make sense?
We will have a stance, and we then have a supporting act to verify that. Park this for a moment.
Similarly, we all have a set of values and principles that give a certain vibe to our life. From this we shape our conversations and relational communication. In all instances, however life is unfolded we almost always maintain that very same stance.
That stance becomes our comfort zone. We have a comfortable thought process zone which in turn shapes the hue and colour we give to the experiences we have. Now, imagine, for example, you suffer from low self esteem, except it doesn’t seem it because you have mustered all you can to be anything other than altogether. You want to maintain a persona, your particular stance. Someone else comes in, and you can feel your stance falling to pieces, what do you do? Instead of saving the stance, you can adopt a different persona to hide away that low self esteem or, you can phone a friend!
Oh yes! Your ego feels threatened. You don’t see it as that. You call a friend, you try and get your allies together. What appears as a normal conversation is in effect you trying to soothe yourself and ensure that your stance is the correct one and most appropriate one. We are forever seeking this sort of soothing when we feel unsafe and threatened. Perhaps at that time we don’t know we are feeling this way. One low self esteemed will comfort the other low self esteemed and rather than face the trigger and trace the root of why they feel they even need to come together to “save” one another, they end up maintaining the very stance that is the canker of the soul. It is the hindrance.
We are designed to self preserve and survive. Similarly, by forming alliances to support our stance, whilst on one hand it is soothing and comforting it might just be damning to the journey into understanding our consciousness and owning it.
Healthy alliance will always expand your consciousness whilst when one is using the teaming with others to cope with the stress of being challenged, this can prove to contract one’s awareness and self sabotaging any progress.
Understand why we need alliance to support our stance. Is this necessary or a by product of a lack of belief in the Self?
Blessings
Mama Kee x