We are in a sort of spiritual revolution I call the spiritual reawakening of the global mind. Everywhere you look we are making over our lives doing over some parts or reaffirming our belief systems. There is a flavour of it’s time to get real, and walk my talk. We have some wonderful writers emerging sharing their creative flair with stringing words together that heal us, and bring us catharsis and affirmation. We have mostly arisen to the core of us and the soul self. That drive into who am I has been planted and we see it sprouting into why I am to how I am to just I am. This is actually happening as opposed to just downloading a teaching and trying to practice it.
All of those days of clearing out the clutter have finally paid off, we are looking at deeper levels and have a new found recognition of even more sophisticated clutter. It is there and is now rising to the surface for us to deal with and pay attention to. It also needs to be integrated after all. Now that we have the mantras the chanting and all else holistic under our belts in our armoury, we delve into the behavioural and cognitive side of us too.
Even with all the spiritual know how we still find ourselves at loggerheads with concepts such as the law of attraction or manifestation, or the power of now. They seem far off. Whilst we have gained a new dimension or an awareness of it, we have not really. We know of it, but we have not become it. This keeps us hooked to our rituals such as daily chanting prayers reading and whatever else that stabilises that new found awareness that you feel you are fully connected and engaged with.
But you still struggle with stabilising your emotions. Why? You still play mind games. You still tell a million small white lies including you are feeling alright when you are not really. You still keep the facade of you. You still hold on to a reality that no longer serves you. You feel you have really advanced on your journey yet you can’t face your dark moments. You buy into the latest trends in motivation spirituality and anything that will keep you inspired. You write beautifully you feel very empowered even and love to share but someone else’s empowerment and love encroach ensnare at your more sophisticated sense of self that is still fragile. Why?
Have you heard of post traumatic stress disorder? I think most of us have. Add to that complex and we are in the realm of an ongoing exposure to trauma such as domestic violence abuse neglect so much so that as a child you have a very warped sense of self and your self worth is also very entangled with sources of love. The mother wound is when a mother has been emotionally absent to a child’s needs. These are very broad definitions and you can look these up at leisure. Here, I am merely touching upon these by way of example of phrases and words we have coined to describe that state of us when a hole is found and in wanting inside of our psyche self.
Whichever way we look at it, we all suffer from a longing to be and belong. It would be very difficult to retain our original signature at least on the outside meaning the external body as infants even at the hands of the best and most meaningful parents and caregivers. An infants brain and a child’s are very complex and little understood. They don’t have the tools to understand the adult or their motive. Even a well meaning “no” could cause agitation in the infant. They simply cannot make sense of a lot and will make of it what they will. This will get stored somewhere in their brain and psyche with the power to literally shape their response to life people places and situations. It is their awareness cumulatively developed and even with then help of their caregivers that they will be able to make sense of their childhood and environment.
The mother wound is a phrase that gives us the understanding that a lot of our issues come from the lack of emotional connection that our mothers had with us which would have been passed on to them by their own mothers. We lived in a generation as they did of not knowing what love is despite it being all around us we didn’t know how to translate that. Our mothers were probably one of many or not but were not shown or modelled what love was. Fathers were mainly absent and not engaged with their children. Perhaps this is why back then you needed a village to parent a child whereas now with the rise in consciousness it takes just one conscious constant parent to bring a child up.
The era before was one of utter blindness to emotion and feeling. An infant can have feelings! Wow oh really! That was almost unthinkable. Our body stores everything and every experience. Some of it we cannot consciously remember but it will definitely show itself in our unconscious reactions to life. Yep!
If you have suffered of any known trauma hopefully by now you would have sought some closure and therapy. The most important part of recovery is to have an enlightened witness. Just taking someone else through the crevices of your mind and thoughts of how you feel about situations and your story can help off load. What is happening is that you are giving the silent parts of you words, and a caring ear so these are heard, so you are heard. It is not the same as seeking validation but just seeking to be heard for your story was gone untold thus far.
The wounds are part and parcel of who we are but as parents knowing of the impact of these on us we can actively take measures to try to alleviate any deviance from our child’s sense of self in how we manage our own response to them. If you lose a handle on things despite all of the conscious efforts you have made then you are most likely harbouring a deep wound that just needs to be seen and heard. Don’t try and over complicate life for yourself by then by either forcing a particular wound to be heard even when it’s gone or not the problem, but check in to see why you are stuck in the “I need help” mode.
Yes we all suffered at the hands of an era of the stone hearted for they were also shunned; but to continue to blame them will only prolong your suffering and the cycle of shame guilt and separation. If you acne out seriously injured and wounded, you don’t need to go through that again but also don’t hold on to the pain anymore. Turn the pain into your power, see these wounds and holes as your treasure chests of you. These are little sites in your psyche waiting to be explored and they will give you back a heft return of wholeness.
Returning to innocence is also letting go of these phrases and concepts. Holding onto labels tag validate our limitations or our victim hood keeps us in emotional lockdown. And we will remain in our little cocoons without the will to venture out lest we break or someone finds our deepest pain unbearable leaving us again as we were left when we were still so little to understand abandonment.
Free yourself from the burden of someone else’s unconscious so that you can come together as the whole of you fully conscious alert engaged and present to the whole of you.