How do we know we don’t feel we deserve? And are we allowed to deserve? Let’s start with the dictionary meaning below.
deserving adjective
1: having good qualities that deserve praise, support, etc. : MERITORIOUS, WORTHY
- rewarding deserving workers
- scholarships for deserving students
2: appropriately having or being given something specified —used with of
- a proposal deserving of support [=a proposal that deserves support]
- a criminal deserving of punishment
From the above the deserving energy is based on merit. At school our merit is calculated using grades behaviour and extra curricular activities. At home if all depends on the values of the caregivers or those of the brood rulers. At work, it ranges from performance to your makeup. BUT, these are all external measures of what we amount to.
How do we feel about ourselves? How meritorious is how we present ourselves in life? What’s our worth in our own perceptron? Therefore, what is our value worth and esteem in our own eyes? Based on who I am what do I feel I deserve?
The entire basis upon which what we can contain in our pot of deservingness is a product of how we perceive ourselves. When our internal radar is set to a lower than our net worth, anything we have earned and deserve, we are like to self sabotage to maintain that low level. It’s a bit like having a deservingness thermostat.
What if my thermostat is set quite high but my actual “worth” is quite low- for example, you obtain and accumulate money using inappropriate means that hurt your fellow human. But your measure of “deservingness” energy is set quite high. This unrealistic high based on your actual worth becomes an unhealthy sense of entitlement because your self worth is attached to a greed that is non expansive.
When our deserving thermostat is set to an exact measure of our worth, as long as our means of obtaining that merit are expansive, our “deserving energy pot” will remain open mouthed always catching that prize. We graciously receive and keep it. We don’t part with it or self sabotage because we know that it is okay to deserve, it is totally acceptable that we accept, and we are okay to receive unashamedly.
To receive is not shameful; yet we might have it in our timelines that either we are not worthy of receiving or that we must live to be givers rather than takers. We must sacrifice what’s rightful ours for a promised land or some other worldly merit.
To feel I deserve is natural and a given when our timelines haven’t been skewed with giving and receiving imbalances.
One of the key reasons why some people can win the lottery and become money poor again is that deep down they don’t feel they deserve this. They have a money poverty complex. Whilst, the others will move from riches to rags and back to riches in no time because their deserving energy is high.
Aim to keep your deserving energy deep and wide so that your pot of merit is always open mouthed ready to receive what we have earned. We earn our awareness. Our awareness earns our expanded experience beyond our five senses. Our expanded experiences magnify our pot of receptivity because with that expansion how we perceive ourselves unfolds an unknown infinity. That we are infinite. So our deserving energy too is.
Blessings
Mama Kee x